Teen Sex

14-year-old girl: “Sex for me is like dancing. I love dancing with different men.”

Doctor: “Do you even feel anything when you dance with these men”?

14-year-old girl: “Sometimes. I have a lot of feelings. They last a while and then they go away.”

Doctor: “Do these men even have feelings for you?”

14-year-old girl: “Sometimes, for a minute.”

Doctor: “If you have a sister and she tells you she wants to have sex, what will you say to her?”

14-year-old girl: “I’ll tell you to wait.”

Doctor: “So why do you do what you do?”

14-year-old girl: “I’m the most popular girl in ninth grade.”

This is a dialogue (though not verbatim) from a movie I recently saw on television. It was very realistic, it surely caught my attention and inspired me to write this article.

Like this girl in the movie, I had sex when I was 14 years old. The only difference between her and me was that I had sex with only one boy and that he did not have any diseases. Still, many of his thoughts were my own thoughts back then, and surely these are your thoughts too … in a way.

There is something about sex that we are very curious about at a young age. It makes us wonder how it feels. It makes us think that we become more mature when we dedicate ourselves to it. And just like what this girl thought, it makes us think that we can gain popularity through him.

When your friends start sharing their sexual experiences with you, you start wondering how he really feels. And most of the time, people paint a really pretty picture in your mind, even if they didn’t enjoy it. Guys brag about it; and also the girls. No one will ever talk about their bad experiences with him.

Having sex for men makes them feel like they have achieved something. It makes them feel like real men. For girls, it is totally different. She starts to feel good when the boy starts to want her. She doesn’t really see it as sex. She sees him more like getting her attention and being liked by this guy. This is what the 14-year-old girl in the movie meant when she said that boys’ feelings for her last for a minute. Then he starts wanting the attention again, which is why he eventually keeps giving in to it.

Regardless of age, boys and girls will always be the same. I remember a saying that says: Men give love to have sex; Girls give sex to get love. In short, men are lustful beings and women are emotional beings. Put these two needs together and you have teenagers whose hormones and testosterones are easily activated.

Unfortunately, teen sex never leads to anything good. In fact, God Himself is against it, not because He doesn’t want you to enjoy it, but because He wants you to really enjoy it. Think of it this way … your parents want to give you the best car you can get. They don’t want to give you anything less than that. However, they have to wait for the right moment to give it to you. God is the same way. He wants to give you the gift of sex, which was designed by Him, at the right time and place, and that is in marriage.

Believe me, no adolescent who has ever had sex has ever enjoyed it the way God designed it to be enjoyed. Honestly, your bodies aren’t fully developed yet when you’re in your teens. More than this, you are still mentally and emotionally immature. You may think you are or can be physically good at it, but that doesn’t mean you’re good in the way that you can be good.

It takes a deep intimacy with the other person to feel so free and relaxed with sex. This intimacy and freedom can only be experienced in marriage. In marriage there is no fear of being caught, of having a disease, of acting better than others, of proving yourself to your partner, etc. You are free to be who God created you. You freely serve the other person because of your great love for them. It is not a superficial high but something very deep and intense.

Teen sex may feel good, but it doesn’t last. Just scratch the surface. Then it leads to destruction. How many teenage pregnancies and abortions have resulted from this? How much extreme jealousy that led to murder has happened as a result? How many teens got STDs as a result? How many boys and girls have actually been injured and injured?

In that movie I was talking about, a girl had oral sex with her boyfriend. He really liked it. Then one day the guy took her to his room with another friend with his girlfriend and wanted her to have group sex with them. The girl said, “But I just want to have sex with you.” She was so shocked at what she was trying to do. She ran away and the boy still stayed in the room with the other couple. That surely broke her heart.

Teenage boys are not mature enough to even understand the emotions that girls go through. Teenage girls are also not mature enough to handle their own emotions. This is where things can get very complicated. It’s a lot of drama, for sure.

Teen sex, or any other sex outside of marriage, will never work the way sex was designed because it goes against the grain. It’s like using an appliance for something it wasn’t designed for. You may think it is running until the engine dies or breaks completely.

Sex is a gift from God to you for your marriage. It is supposed to be your gift to your future husband / wife. It is not meant to be opened now and used by someone else. Even if you eventually end up married to the person you are having sex with, you still can’t open the gift early or you will ruin it. This happened to me and that is why my first marriage failed. He was my boyfriend at 14 and the boy I gave my virginity to. I had sex with him at 14 and continued to have sex with him, leading to my pregnancy and a marriage for which we were unprepared. It hurt not only him and me, but also our children and the people around us.

It is not as difficult as you think it is if you think you deserve the best. This is where it all begins. If you think you deserve nothing but the best that God has to offer you, then you will wait for the best and the best time. You will not give that special gift to anyone. It is reserved for the person God created for you.

It will also be easier if you consider that you have an enemy dying to destroy, kill and rob you. His name is satan and he is your number one enemy. He wants you to give up that gift so you don’t have the best that God has to offer. He wants to steal that gift from you. He wants to kill you with illness or the anger of a jealous boyfriend / girlfriend. He wants to destroy your life. To give in to sex before marriage is to give in to the devil. You want that?

In the midst of pressure and temptation from your peers, you can win if you focus on God and His Word. You will not be able to do it on your own. You need Jesus and the power of the Holy Spirit.

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