Divorce Tips: How to Heal from a Divorce in a Therapy Session

Healing from a divorce takes time, and people going through this process may experience a range of emotions including sadness, guilt, anger, resentment, anxiety, frustration, and depression.

The good news is that therapy can speed up the healing process and help people view the end of their marriage in a more positive light.

A few years ago, I developed a visualization technique based on Ericksonian Psychotherapy and Hypnosis that seems to help many divorcees recover from their loss and restore their general well-being.

A description of this technique appears below.

Close your eyes and take a deep breath as you listen to my voice.

Each time you inhale through your nose and exhale through your mouth. And every time you inhale you feel relaxation, peace and healing. And each time you exhale, release or decrease any pain, sadness, or any negative or uncomfortable thoughts or unpleasant emotions.

Your breath then becomes a powerful healing tool. You can use your breath to adjust your mood whenever you need to.

And as you use your breath to heal yourself, you may also discover that your mind can go back in time if you choose.

And as you go back in time…

Do you remember when you were a boy or a girl?

You may remember what you were like back then, or you may have seen photos and videos of yourself from your childhood.

You may also remember what the house you grew up in was like.

Now, when you were a kid, you probably fell while jogging or riding a bike. And most likely you hurt your knee or elbow. And your arm or your leg probably bled what seemed like a lot back then.

Then your mom or dad or a neighbor came and gave you a hug and comforted you.

They washed the wound and applied an antiseptic to the lesion. This probably hurt a bit. When it was placed on your wound, you may have felt that you would have to feel a little worse before you could feel a little better.

And then your caregiver applied just the right size band-aid or gauze pad to cover and protect your wound.

This helped you feel less pain, a little safer, and a little more confident.

The wound may have felt worse the next day and even for a few more days or weeks.

You probably had to change the band-aid every day or so. And you may need to wash the injured place frequently.

But over time, the wound began to heal, although you scratched it sometimes, as most children do.

And after the passage of a little more time, a scab formed, all the bleeding stopped, and the old skin was replaced by a softer but tougher new skin.

After a little more time, the pain almost completely subsided. However, you still had some good and bad days with your injury.

Now, it is possible that the pain of some injuries never disappears one hundred percent.

Many of us have physical aches and pains that stay with us, but we carry on despite them.

But luckily, sometimes eighty or ninety percent healing is enough to keep us feeling good overall.

As you can see, the mind heals from emotional loss and wounds in the same way that it heals from physical wounds.

So if you or someone you love is struggling with a loss, think about the healing process described in the metaphor.

Maybe it will help lessen your pain, allow you to heal, and move on with your life in a more positive spirit.

Give it a try. Interestingly, this same technique has been used by people dealing with the death of a loved one.