How to respond when your life takes an unexpected turn

Things get easier and life goes on

Most people panic when their life takes an unexpected turn. And you? Have you experienced sudden changes in your life? If so, what lessons did you learn? Reflect on your answers as I describe how to respond when life takes an unexpected turn. There is no doubt that these experiences can be unsettling, especially if we are not prepared. It may seem that our foundations are crumbling before us and the uncertainty of the future. But this is only the initial response and it rarely lasts. Depending on our circumstances, life’s unexpected twists and turns can propel us into a new future we never considered.

Let me explain using personal examples. I have previously written how I experienced three unexpected changes in my life. The first was losing my father to a long illness. The second turning point was being diagnosed with a life-threatening illness, from which I recovered. The third event occurred when I changed careers from a menswear designer to an author, speaker, and trainer. I could not have expected these experiences to take place, much less be here to write about them. One thing I know: the event itself is not as damaging as we think, but what matters most is our attitude to maintain our composure. Since those times, I have experienced other difficulties and setbacks in my life. Thus, my turning points awakened the resilience of the human spirit and powers I never knew I had.

While it’s a cliché, what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger because our challenges turn our weaknesses into strengths. They activate qualities we never knew we had, until we called on them. For example, if a person loses a parent or loved one to illness, the impact can reverberate through their lives for a long time. I couldn’t go through the hospital where my father died for two years because of the painful memories. But things got easier. Life goes on and if we are compassionate with ourselves, we can overcome these challenges and become tender in those difficult places. It is as if life softens us through our challenges. Do you agree? Have you overcome similar difficulties? If so, maybe the wounds are still fresh, but how are you coping?

Greet their difficulties with curiosity and openness

How we respond when life takes an unexpected turn determines the trajectory of our future. If we get caught up in our pain and suffering, we get caught up in our wounds. I am not suggesting that we should not experience suffering. I am saying that we should experience all of our emotions, such as loss, hurt, disappointment, anger, or regret. We must allow these emotions to move through us, instead of sweeping them under the rug. So, respond to your challenges by fully experiencing your emotions when life takes an unexpected turn. This will only help you move through the experience of him and allow life to take you to the next destination. I assure you that when you experience a setback, a disappointment or a loss, everything becomes easier. It’s not that you don’t experience pain and disappointment, but rather that you develop the resilience to get through it every time.

Everyone has a different pain threshold. What one person finds painful may be inconvenient for another. I discovered through writing and coaching hundreds of people over the years that we can build our resilience muscle by being exposed to challenges and setbacks. I am not saying that we deliberately subject ourselves to difficulties because life will bring us those challenges regardless. I am suggesting we respond kindly and welcome our difficulties with curiosity and openness. The curiosity I speak of is being guided to awaken our greater selves. I don’t know your particular story, but I’m sure if we were talking over coffee, you’d have questions about overcoming a recent challenge or setback. So this is how I would respond: embrace what is happening instead of trying to run away from it.

Running away from pain is not the antidote to healing and transformation. In fact, it is like an avalanche in which a rock gains momentum as it rolls down a mountain; taking everything in its path. The same thing happens when we put off important life lessons. Although we escape the pain temporarily, it will eventually come back like a raging tornado and paralyze us. So with this understanding, I invite you to consider the unexpected changes you are experiencing. If you had to write down five key lessons, what are they? How have you integrated those experiences into your life? For example, one lesson I learned from the loss of my father is to be more compassionate with myself and with others. In fact, he has become my superpower and something I wouldn’t change a thing for. So while an unexpected turn can be a difficult period in our lives, if we are honest with ourselves, it can be the best thing that can happen to us.